Its Not Easy…..and Walking Out Your Calling never will be.
I am a homeschooling Mama and I am walking out my calling. People think I make biscuits and gravy, bake muffins, and churn home made butter all whilst rising at 5 am with my littles while we singing Kumbaya, My Lord…then we take nature walks and knit our clothes…right???
Heck to the Noooo.
Truth– I do not churn butter at 5 am. I also dont knit our clothes lol! However, this year I have had a very negative attitude about even starting school when I know I should be excited. You know my husband and I teach our kids…. “Positive attitude is required for success in everything in life.” I wish I could take our own advice. Every year its a chore to get my kids into the right routine. Every year its hard to get myself into the routine. Every year about this time I think about jumping ship and calling the big yellow bus to come….
I have a Bachelors and a MBA. I graduated with honors in all my academics. Once not long ago, I had a high paying, fast growing career….and sometimes I feel like I should have never left that career and be a regular contributor to our finances. But I know that is not my calling. I am learning right now…..that Walking Out Your Calling is never easy.
Fact– This is hard. This is very hard. I never wanted to homeschool, but I was called to do it. I never wanted to stay home, but…I was called to raise my own children and teach them our values. To raise these arrows that will be our future. This quiver is so important. Honestly, for me, working was easier in some ways. A lot of days I feel like my current tasks are mundane and useless. I feel like the work He has called me to right now has no purpose. Because I can not see results immediately. But the truth is, my work is very important. It is purposed filled. I am raising arrows. Our arrows that will change the future. My Father in heaven is refining me daily. I realize that Walking Out Your Calling is never easy.
Fact– Following what you are called to do isn’t supposed to be easy. I was reminded of this today while I was listening to a podcast and contemplating how in the world I was going to fit in all the things I need to do for school this year as well as preparing for our coop. Jesus reminded me that this is my season. This is my calling. This is what I am SUPPOSED to do. He reminded me that Mary followed her calling – but it wasn’t easy. Let me explain. Can you imagine being Mary, the mother of Jesus. Can you imagine falling in love with your baby boy. Raising him, watching him crawl, then walk. Loving every moment of being his momma only to learn that her son she loves is going to die. The messenger angle never promised that. Can you imagine her fear of being the Son of God’s mom? Talk about a mind-blowing experience. I bet Mary wondered a lot about was she good enough, was she doing everything right? For goodness sakes…Walking Out Your Calling is never easy.
We know that Mary was scared. The angel told her in the beginning not be afraid. It is ok to ask God for direction when you feel like you are not enough, and its ok to be scared while you are following your calling. Walking Out Your Calling is never easy.
Have you ever wondered when you will ‘feel” like God can use you to accomplish great things? If you are not careful you can fall into a trap. A trap that is easy to miss. Satan can feed you tiny little lies. These little lies (if you believe them) can lead you to dark pit. This pit can leave you “feeling” like you are not accomplishing your dreams or calling. There are so many times we question God about what he has called us to do.
Do you ever feel like you aren’t enough to accomplish your calling? Have you ever questioned God if you were on the right path? Have you ever wallowed in self-doubt? Have you ever compared yourself to the people you know that run in your circle of friends? I know I have. Life Tip: Comparison is the Thief of Joy….never compare it leads to self destruction.
All you have to do is look on social media and then you really question your calling! Have you ever caught yourself thinking….
If I had that job I would do well….
If I didn’t have a job I could accomplish more…..
If I was married…
If I had a different husband…
If I had her hair…..her body…..
If I had less children….
If I could homeschool….
If I didn’t homeschool….
If my husband didn’t travel…..
If my husband made more money…..
If my parents live closer we would have more help…..
If my kids would listen…
The list goes on.
It’s time to trust God in the process. I have realized that Jesus isn’t going to tell me how it all ends. He just wants me to trust him in the now. The Present. We can ask for direction and guidance and listen for that. To my knowledge when the angle appeared to Mary, he never told Mary that some day she would watch her precious son Jesus be crucified. At least not in the stories we have. It was written in prophecy yes, but stick with me here. If Mary knew at that moment, then the walk would have been too hard and too heavy a burden for her to carry. Jesus was meant to carry our burdens. Our daily burdens when it feels too heavy.
Remember 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 says…
“Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.”
Wherever He has you today, my prayer is that you wouldn’t ask God to take you out of that spot because it is hard, but rather that God would give you the strength and confidence to carry on YOUR mission and YOUR calling. Its ok to be different. Its ok to be in the position your in. in Christ YOU are strong. YOU ARE MAKING A DIFFERENCE. YOU ARE CALLED. He has given us all different strengths for a reason…to use YOUR CALLING for His purposes.
2 Timothy 4:7-8 ESV
“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved his appearing.”